Notice Me, Hanschen
by entwined-in-a-web
Summary: Ernst Robel has always had a crush on Hanschen Rilow. But what will happen to their relationship when Hanschen is struck ill? Bad summary, sorry...REVIEW PLEASE!


**A/N: Well, howdy! I haven't written directly for SA in forever!….when someone flamed me and said 'fuck this' to one of my fics. Please do not be rude. I know I'm not a regular here. Constructive criticism I can take, but when you're being flat out rude, that's different.**

**So I'm writing a Hernst fic. It's my first time writing these guys as a couple, so please PLEASE don't flame! **

**On a happier note, while getting distracted, I stumbled upon a video of the lovely Steffi D (I'm like obsessed with her videos I SWEAR!). The tour cast assembled a band called The Bobby Mailers (I always thought it was Maler, but I trust them XD) Kind of made my day…=D**

**Thanks to my twinsie who helped me with this idea! We're gonna film our own version of SA…only without the partial nudity. XD I'm Ilse.**

**Anywho…**

**REVIEW PLEASE! And don't flame!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own SA…or Ernst, as much as I love him.**

Every day I'd sit in class and I couldn't help but to feel distracted. I knew something was there that I just couldn't ignore. And that was you. I couldn't hide my feelings anymore. You were all that occupied my mind. And when we kissed, I felt…enlightened. Everything for once seemed perfect.

But then you started to go away. You would miss class often. I tried to pay closer attention to the lesson, praying that I get this Virgil done before Herr Sonnenstitch realizes that I didn't finish it because I was up all night thinking about you. It worries me, actually. Mama says she's starting to notice how heavy my eyes are from the lack of sleep. But I can't tell her why I'm not sleeping. I could never tell anyone. And that frightens me sometimes, that I'm trapped. But then I looked at you…and I realize that it's all worth it.

But my life all changed…

That morning before class, I sat at my desk, finishing up those last few equations that I should have finished last night. I heard a fuss going on behind me. Everyone was gathered around Melchior, which was really no surprise to me. He was always the popular one, strong and handsome, intelligent…No wonder all the girls adored him. But I steered clear…

I heard him panting, like he had been running, telling his stories to my eager classmates. "It was so strange…We never talk…"

"Who?" Georg asked, wanting every detail of this story.

"Hanschen."

And that's when I knew it was serious. The moment he mentioned your name…I felt shivers down my spine as I turned around and dimwittedly spoke out.

"What about Hanschen?"

"He's ill," Melchior explained delicately. "He wrote me this morning and told me that…" he paused for a moment to turn back to his friends when he realized. "Actually…he mentioned you in the letter, Ernst."

"H-He did?" I stuttered, letting my fear get the best of me. "Wh-What did he say?"

"He wanted you to visit him after class today." he mournfully looked down at his feet. "You're lucky you have a good friend like him."

I knew what he meant by this. He was still shaken from poor Moritz Stiefel's death. I wouldn't blame him either…I knew I'd feel the same way if you died…

But I wanted so bad to just boast that we were more than just friends. I loved you…I would always think about you and I would never let you go…But I knew I couldn't.

"Yes…" I responded quietly. "I guess I am. Thank you, Melchi."

He weakly smiled at me as I turned back to my equations, worried sick about what was happening with you.

The day ended so fast…I darted straight to your home, knocking on the door furiously. Your mama answered it and told me that you were upstairs and to be careful because you were feeling rather ill. I nodded furiously and ran to your room.

You laid on your bed, defeated. You didn't look like the same Hanschen Rilow that I knew, that I fell in love with. But a shell of who that boy used to be. You were sickly and pale and weak. You could barely lift your head to see that it was me at your door. I pulled up a chair and sat by your side, grabbing onto your cold, clammy hand.

"Ernst…" you barely managed to whisper. "You came…"

I smiled a little, trying to brighten the situation. "Of course I came."

You took a moment to cough roughly, your face showed that you were in pain. "The doctor says its tuberculosis….He thinks I'm going to die…"

I just stopped and stared at you. My breathing got shallower. No. _No._

"Y-You c-can't die, Hanschen. Y-You'll get better. You'll be f-fine…"

You let out another violent cough, squeezing my hand as hard as you could. "We all have our time, Ernst. And mine is now."

"N-Now? Right now? Hansy, please! Don't leave me! Stay with me…_please_, Hanschen…"

You winced as you took in a deep breath and forced yourself to lean forward. I felt tears emerge in my eyes as your lips gently brushed against my forehead. We remained in that position for what seemed like forever, our foreheads touching. You placed your hand gently on my cheek in an attempt to comfort me.

"I love you, Ernst…" he barely whispered. And with that, you gently laid yourself back down, your eyes getting heavier and heavier.

Until they closed for good.

I began to cry, wailing like I was mad. When I lost you that day, I thought back on everything. From the day we met, when all I ever wanted was for you to notice me. And now, you gave me this…You gave me hope and you gave me love when I had none. And even though you've passed away, I plan to give these all back to you.

I still love you, Hanschen Rilow. As I have never loved anyone.

**A/N: Awww! Poor Ernst! They are just so cute!**

**Ok…Moritz, Ernst and Georg are all tied for my favorite character…HELP!**

**Reviews?**


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